Iranian version of “Let it snow”
به من و تو ربطی نداره
This morning, while still in bed, I thought of this Iranian saying beshin, befarma, betamarg (“sit down”, “please sit down” and “get your ass down”), expressing the same content by different manners.
I thought of writing a post and illustrating this with a few examples. For instance you don’t agree with something like… let’s say … the outcome of some election. You might get a whole range of answers to your reactions. It might be: “Oh my! Why would you think such a nonsense?“, or “Oh dear! I have no time for that but come over and let’s check it together” or “F&#$ off you lousy bastard or I’ll kick you f*&#ing ass” et ceteras and even darker et ceteras.
Later, I found this series of classy insults in the inbox. Instead of elaborating on the above let’s just post it as it is.
These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.
- The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, “If you were my husband I’d give you poison.” He said, “If you were my wife, I’d drink it.”
- A member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.” “That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”
- “He had delusions of adequacy.” – Walter Kerr
- “He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” – Winston Churchill
- “I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” – Clarence Darrow
- “He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” – William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
- “Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.” – Moses Hadas
- “I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” – Mark Twain
- “He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.” – Oscar Wilde
- “I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend…. if you have one.” – George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
- “Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second… if there is one.” – Winston Churchill, in response.
- “I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.” – Stephen Bishop
- “He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” – John Bright
- “I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.” – Irvin S. Cobb
- “He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.” – Samuel Johnson
- “He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” – Paul Keating
- “He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.” – Forrest Tucker
- “His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” – Mae West
- “Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” – Oscar Wilde
- “He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.” – Andrew Lang
- “He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” – Billy Wilder
- “I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” – Groucho Marx
. If you’re looking for the key to the Universe, I’ve got some good news, and some bad news. The bad news: there is no key to the Universe. The good news: it was never locked.
. There’s no need to change the world. All we have to do is toilet train the world and we’ll never have to change it again. Read all 10 guidelines
When I posted the first call-a-shoe shine in Tehran, I wasn’t aware of this October 2006 Guardian article, Ali’s ambition shines bright:”With its traffic-clogged streets, terrifyingly aggressive drivers and asphyxiating pollution, Tehran is hardly tailor-made for following Norman Tebbit’s prescription to get ‘on your bike’ in search of work. But heedless of the mayhem of the Iranian capital, that’s what Ali Hasankhani does every day…” read more
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If you don’t know about them, read this first. Entertainment guarantied.
The Yes Men have done it again, june 2007
Update: The Yes Men and Bill Moyers, Ann El Khoury
Enough serious stuff, here is a refreshing and tonic article. I was searching something else – I have forgotten by now what it was – and ended up there. This happens occasionally.
I didn’t know Fred till 15 mn ago. Just a few quotes to give you a taste of it:
“The steps limned below will facilitate disaster without imposing the burden of reinventing it … … Besides, comprehension would only lead to depression… … Remember that doctrine and optimism should always outweigh history and common sense … … the complementary halves of a migraine headache … … If the population falls we must import Mexicans or North Africans or somebody because the purpose of a country is to build suburbs …”
Here is his last article, The War on Muslims: “Methinks we don’t – think, I mean, about anything outside our immediate visual horizon. Thinking is a poor way of understanding the world, which is too complex to be thought about effectively. That leaves hormones and unfortunate limbic wiring … ” read more
ZURICH, Switzerland – What began as a routine training exercise almost ended in an embarrassing diplomatic incident after a company of Swiss soldiers got lost at night and marched into neighboring Liechtenstein … the 170 infantry soldiers wandered just over a mile across an unmarked border into the tiny principality early Thursday before realizing their mistake and turning back.
A spokesman for the Swiss army confirmed the story but said that there were unlikely to be any serious repercussions for the mistaken invasion. “We’ve spoken to the authorities in Liechtenstein and it’s not a problem” … Officials in Liechtenstein also played down the incident.
Interior ministry spokesman Markus Amman said nobody in Liechtenstein had even noticed the soldiers, who were carrying assault rifles but no ammunition. “It’s not like they stormed over here with attack helicopters or something,” he said.
Liechtenstein, which has about 34,000 inhabitants and is slightly smaller than Washington DC, doesn’t have an army.